July 2

In that case, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it. — Rom 7:17 BSB

Paul gives us a glimpse into his inner life, and we see a fierce struggle.

The two sides of him were completely opposite in their nature and purpose. “I don’t do what I want to do, but what I hate, that’s what I do.” His better self agreed with what was right, but the other self, which seemed stronger, kept doing what was wrong. “It’s no longer me doing it, but the sin living in me.”

The good that was fighting inside him was the new life—Christ living in him. The other part of him was sin, fighting hard to hold on. For a while, it seemed like the evil was winning.

“I want to do good, but I can’t carry it out. The good I want to do, I don’t do. Instead, I end up doing the evil I don’t want to do.” We can understand this if we’re genuinely trying to live a holy life.

Fenelon’s prayer goes, “Lord, take me, because I can’t give myself to You. And when You have me, keep me, because I can’t keep myself. And save me, even from myself.”